


Tony Stark Doesn't Wear Pants Around the House

by therealfroggy



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Fluff and Humor, M/M, no pants challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-05
Updated: 2020-08-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:41:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25735210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/therealfroggy/pseuds/therealfroggy
Summary: Tony Stark does not wear pants around the house. Steve Rogers does not approve.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Kudos: 107





	Tony Stark Doesn't Wear Pants Around the House

**Author's Note:**

> Does anyone else remember the old no-pants challenge, I think it was from LiveJournal somewhere? Challenge ran: pick a character, any character, and write about the day they don't wear pants, for whatever reason. I don't know if more people actually wrote a fill for that prompt. I did.

It should not come as a surprise to anyone that Tony went pants-less in his own house. Considering all the press he'd gotten since he began dating, and all the attention he drew to himself with his lifestyle and his habits, everyone in the free world should know what kind of man he was. Compared to everything else about him that had made the headlines so far, going pants-less in his own home was nothing. It was outright polite, for Tony.

Apparently, not everybody felt the same way about that.

“Tony!” Steve sputtered, outraged, as Tony wandered into the kitchen one morning in search of coffee. Well, technically it was early afternoon, but Tony was awake and working.

Tony poured himself a cup and took a long swallow. Ah, sweet fluid of life, come to papa. “What?”

“You can't... This is the kitchen,” Steve said sternly, gesturing to Tony with a wave of the hand.

Tony looked down himself. Thin long-sleeved shirt, charcoal boxer briefs, house slippers. He looked back at Steve. “Yeah? So?”

“So people eat here,” Steve said incredulously. “And, and people sit here. For breakfast and lunch and things. You need to put pants on before you come in here.”

“Well, Cap, you see, there's this thing I like to do occasionally. It's called being comfortable in my own home. My house, my rules. And I say, pants are entirely optional at all times. Especially team meetings,” Tony said, going to search for Pop Tarts or toast or some other edible thing.

“But Tony -” Steve began, just as Bruce walked into the room.

“Tony, where's the box of various nuts and bolts gone?” Bruce asked as he refilled his mug. “I need one that's slightly worn.”

“Bruce, back me up here,” Steve said. “Tony needs to wear pants in the kitchen.”

Bruce raised his eyebrows and looked at Tony, taking in his pants-less appearance. “Why?”

Steve stared at the scientist. “Because – because it's a kitchen! People eat here!”

“Well, he's not sitting on the countertops, is he?” Bruce said with a shrug. Coffee in hand, he turned and headed back the way he'd come.

“Check the downstairs living room!” Tony yelled after Bruce's retreating back. “Bolts should be there!”

“Tony, please, can't you just put some pants on?” Steve said desperately.

Just then, Clint dropped from the ceiling and reached around Tony to snag the last piece of toast before the engineer could help himself. “How did they come off?”

“I sleep naked, you're just lucky I put clothes on before I go downstairs to work,” Tony said. “What, it's not like you wouldn't see as much of me on the beach.”

Natasha came sashaying into the kitchen, those magnificent hips swinging. “Are we going to the beach? I love the beach.”

“You do? Wow, that's very human of you. Beach outing, everyone! We're going beaching!” Tony said with glee.

“Natasha, you can't be okay with this. He's not wearing any pants!” Steve insisted.

“Well, he's got the legs for it,” Natasha said, picked up an apple and bit into it. With an arched eyebrow, she looked Tony up and down and left the kitchen, Clint trailing after her.

Steve shook his head. Tony grinned at the captain.

“See, Steve, nobody takes this seriously except you. It's just skin; not even that much of it. Also, it's my house. I can do what I want in my house, right?”

“Well, I know it's your house, Tony, and I'm very thankful to be living here,” Steve said quickly. He was looking very uncomfortable. “But... but you're not wearing any pants. That's just... rude.”

“Do you actually mind, or is this just your ancient moral code coming to the fore?” Tony asked, genuinely curious. He took another huge gulp of coffee.

Steve blinked at him, suddenly hesitant. “I... I mean... It's... wrong?”

“Nope,” Tony said, cocking his head to one side. “Not by any conceivable moral standard. Try again.”

“It's... it's unhygienic,” Steve stuttered.

“Nope, not unless I'm actually cooking for other people,” Tony countered. “Jarvis, breakfast foods. I want Danish pastries. Order them.”

_“I did so this morning, sir.”_

“It's impractical, and cold,” Steve said pleadingly. “For you, I mean.”

“Not cold, not doing anything that requires protective gear from the waist down,” Tony grinned. He was beginning to enjoy this. “Seriously, Steve, up your game. The forties will be so disappointed with you, failing to uphold their strict sartorial demands. Shame on you, Rogers. Shame.”

“It's frustrating!” Steve snapped, shooting to his feet and beginning to pace the kitchen. “Honestly, Tony, not all of us are capable of ignoring half-naked people without getting a little hot and bothered!”

Tony gaped. Oh. Oh!

“Friends!” Thor boomed, striding into the kitchen. He was carrying a bakery box. “The most excellent Jarvis tells me that these are traditional Midgardian foods to accompany tea or coffee. As I love coffee, I am certain I will love these also.”

Tony was still gaping at Steve. Steve, who was apparently sexually frustrated by the sight of him pants-less. Steve was just realising what he'd admitted, and was beginning to flush a magnificent brick red.

“Sorry, Thor,” Steve said, his voice strangled, and bolted from the room.

“Yeah, sorry, Thor,” Tony said, then put his mug down and flat-out ran after Steve. “Steve! Wait up, Steve!”

“Captain America is headed for his rooms, sir,” Jarvis said politely. “Shall I attempt to dissuade him from barricading himself within?”

“Lock the doors, Jarvis!” Tony huffed, already winded. He followed Steve, turning the hallway corner just in time to see Steve rip the door to his room off its hinges.

Steve stopped and stood staring at the door handle in his hand as it came loose and the door fell noisily to the floor. “I... what?”

“Locked,” Tony panted, stopping and bending over, panting. “Tried stopping you.”

“Jarvis, I'm so sorry,” Steve said, looking up at the ceiling. “I didn't know it was locked.” Then he frowned. “Wait a minute. Why was it locked?”

“Steve, you idiot,” Tony panted, “stop running. Need to talk.”

“No, please, Tony,” Steve said, looking anguished. “I'm sorry about what I said in the kitchen. I shouldn't have mentioned anything. Please just forget about it.”

“No, no,” Tony said, shaking his head vigorously. “You don't get to take that back. When you say frustrated, you mean sexually, right? Over me?”

Steve made a strangled sound. “Nnngyes.”

“Yeah, okay,” Tony said, then took a deep breath. He really needed to start jogging or something. “So then why'd you run away? I mean, not like I wouldn't help you out with that.”

Steve just kept reaching new levels of red-facedness. “Tony, please. Don't joke about this.”

“Not joking, so not joking,” Tony assured him. “Really, Steve. Have you met me? Nothing sexual is ever offensive to me. And I mean, ever.”

“Yeah, but there's... Tony, I didn't think you'd be offended,” Steve said, looking at the floor. He was frowning. “I just didn't think you'd feel the same way.”

Tony grinned. “What, not feel sexually frustrated?”

Steve shook his head, still avoiding Tony's eyes. “About me. I was in the Army, Tony, do you really think I'd get flustered over seeing just any guy in his shorts? It's... It's you. Not the pants.”

Tony stilled. This, he sensed, was a window of opportunity he should not ignore. “So you don't get flustered over people not wearing pants, in general. You're attracted to me.”

Steve nodded. “Yeah. But you don't, I mean, I think you don't play that field, and that's okay, and we can just forget about it, but I thought... Maybe you can start wearing pants around me. Please.”

Tony smiled widely. “I could do that, yeah. Or I could do you one better and help you out with that sexual frustration.”

Steve looked up at him without really raising his head, and Tony thought he'd never seen anyone more beautiful. “You... Really?”

“Really, Rodgers,” Tony said, then put a hand on Steve's shoulder. “Hey. I'm kinda frustrated over you, too, y'know? Those pecs. Those shoulders. That ass.”

Steve ducked his head again. “Well, the serum -”

“But mostly that guy,” Tony said easily, stepping closer to Steve. “You know, just pretty much everything about you. So, you wanna go back downstairs and liberate some of those pastries from Thor? Then we can go down to the TV room and make out on the couch while we're watching old movies.”

Steve looked at him with a dazed smile. “Really?”

“Really,” Tony said, then leaned in to nuzzle affectionately into Steve's neck. “I'll even put on some pants, just for you.”

“Actually...” Steve said, arms coming up around Tony. “I don't mind so much, if you're serious about the making out.”

“Nice,” Tony said, then leaned up to give Steve a quick kiss on the lips. “So, how do you feel about joining my pants-less club?”

Steve grinned widely at his friend. “I think I'll apply for a lifetime membership.”


End file.
